I’m a recovering people pleaser!
Here is a check list that I’ve put together, from my own experience.
First to admit it I am. I didn’t even know the word “NO”! And a boundary, well that was like some distant white picket fence between properties!
As for relationships, I had a hard time keeping them and always, always had the urge to run. When the going got tough, the tough got going.
Trauma and pain exists in all of our lives … everywhere and we all have our own mechanisms that help us to “cope” with what is painful. Sure, some people call them triggers, I prefer “activation points”. There was a time when I felt triggered just by the word “trigger”. Go figure!
We can choose to live in the people pleasing patterns or we can choose to break free from it all and say NO when we want to … and conversely, to say YES when we want to.
One step at a time though. As with everything … small steps make progress!
I’m quite passionate about this people pleasing business, so I have made a video for you, outlining the steps that I have used to move through this crazy pattern. Don’t get me wrong though – I’m not at all against pleasing other people, I think it can be done in a healthy way and have beautiful benefits to any relationship. However, when done at the expense of our own self-worth – that’s where the problems come in.
Check out the video and let me know what you think.
If you would like to connect with me or learn more about my work, come on in and join us in the Soul Empowerment Lounge, or grab my free amazing transformational musical poem “You Choose” … just climb onto my LinkTree here, or message me directly!
Would love to hear from you!